ALOT of Tuscany and a little Umbria

This weekend James and I had our first charge of delivering rental bikes. This means we had to follow blindly a GPS, and hope for the best as our Italian is about 4 beers away from a 6-pack of worthlessness! We can find bathrooms, order beer, and pay for groceries and that's about it! Directional terms escape me and although I got to the point where I actually did ask a nice old lady (with am an amazing 5 o'clock shadow when she turned around) in the tiny hamlet of Baccaiano, the answers are what we are looking for and those come wrapped in a bow of Italian dialect that even some Italians have a hard time understanding. Basically we were on our own, with two kinds of maps, and a GPS that turned out to be on a setting that had us avoiding toll roads (no big deal), highways (a very big deal), and u-turns (a monstrous dealio yo!). Without these things we were routed all over the countryside in a web of tiny roads, farmland, orchards where the bikes on the roof were in danger of clipping branches and insanely steep secondary roads. It was frustrating. But before I complain too much lets take a quick look at the frustrating countryside in which we were feeling stranded...

The first of many mountain passes for the day....

The road we took to get there. I labeled it "guts" in the photo archive for obvious reasons. This is why all the worlds fastest cars come from this region.

The first day all we had to do was get to Pietro Berretta's house. He is a friend of the tour company who runs a small Agritourismo house in the town of Gallina (which means Rooster, or Cock if you will). Agritourismo is a way for local off the grid farms to open up as bed and breakfasts as a way to subsidize tourism funds for agri-business and Pietro is a great dude!! If you are traveling Italy, stay in one of these spots. They are affordable and beautiful and you will have the pleasure of food so fresh someone might get smacked!
This is the view from his kitchen...
Pietro also taught us an important Italian saying.
It goes..."I cooka anda youa two-ah...!!!!
That's James doing his best Ethan Salute. I think it is roughly the same as "I cook - you clean" but the Italian version was hilarious.

We drove through Tuscany and despite feeling lost and like the GPS was screwing us the whole time, most of what we saw went something like this...
........
I call the last one Tuscan Green and I dont think there is anything more astonishing in the world's colour pallette. See if you can zoom in on the castle, you can see some laundry hanging out to dry near the spire on the right!

Sunday was the bulk of the deliveries and despite getting a little lost we had figured out the GPS and were on a role, building confidence the whole way. We spent alot of time in the van but the folks we dropped bikes to were stoked, and we were able to see more if Italy. It was easter sunday and with most of the shops being closed we waited till we got back to Pietro's to eat, which was way too long and we both got a little cranky. We drank some beers and made an insanely hot pasta meal with some unlabeled peppers we found at Pietro's (he had to work late) and crashed out good and cozy at like 9pm. Crafty was right - Colorado eventing has gone soft!!

Monday was a treat as we had most of the morning to get to a town called Cortona to pick up the tandem we had delivered to the shockingly nonreactive Brits the following weekend on the train. Cortona is a town so steep and narrow that only the locals are allowed to drive in so we parked near all the other motorhomes (yes RV'ing is popular here too, but they are small and cute) and walked into town to check it out. We walked to the high point and checked out a big cathedral...

... Navigated some insanely steep streets... and took a ton of pictures. here is one for Cousin, they apparently like succulents in Italy too... we saw a car come up this!


Despite what you might think about small dogs and Italian pride combining to make for an unpleasant interaction with this gruffy little monster, the little bastard wagged his tail when I offered to steal his cute little face and keep him forever and ever. The three-wheeled truck he is obviously not old enough to drive was locked and so he shall stay...

And then much to my surprise enjoyed a cheap lunch of pizza and beers standing just out of the afternoon rain. Might I add, not just a pizza slice, but the pizza I have been waiting for all my life, one that combines two of my favourite foods in all existence. Yes...

The Hot Dog Pizza!!!! Then while we waited for the Tandem couple to show up we made some street art out of a piece of wire that I found.

poo jokes are always funny!! And you know that old Scotty Poo still gets extreme on a bike...proof below. Yeah, I still got it.



The drive home was a breeze, we figured out how to get on the expressway (nothing like seeing the speedometer read 140 after a weekend of creeping around the countryside), and got gas at this massive AGIP petrol roadside attraction. Those reading this who love a good truck stop will be insanely jealous...they have grilled panini, and the beers are cheaper than red bull, so James and I had some road sodas for the ride home and full bellies.

yup, that's open.