With all the building tensions of staying with my once estranged family, witnessing first hand the truth of a situation I want to distance myself from once again, on top of the tensions of transitions as I move away from Florida, and on to California for a couple weeks, then settle again for a stint up in Alaska, I have, needless to say, been slowly creeping up on the verge of a melt down. Songs from the past exacerbate the situation - leaving me feeling like one foot in yesterday and one foot in tomorrow, drinks after work only provide a haze through which I can still make out the shape of trouble to come, and the gravity of a big full moon pulling my mind skyward, it was time to break out the gear and spin my wheels, meet that FULL MOON head on with a smile and a hug....
FMMMR - WKND Edition (Full Moon Madness Midnight Ramble - Weekend Edition)....voila.
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| mountain biking with Fireman Sean (actually a paramedic) |
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| FINALLY!!! |
Then off to the beach for an full moon overnight camp.
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| HUGE wild beach tortoise |
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| FINALLY (part II) |
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| egg sack from a skate, relative of manta rays |
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| florida has castles too |
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| yeah you! You fucker... come here and give us a little love eh? |
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| how I missed your stupid face and bad advice... |
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| late night visitors |
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| sunrise |
Of course after only a couple hours of being back I can feel the stress levels start to creep up again. But I can meet it head on, with a clear mind, and a strong set of personal values. With all the lying these two do to each other and themselves, not to mention me, I choose not to offer my point of view and have started preparing to leave. If nothing else this short visit with the shadowy fragments of my family have shown me how far I have really been, how much I have seen, the power of the truth in both relationships and in the personal truths of the choices we make and live with. The whole experience has pushed me even more readily, more steadfastly, and more securely into what ever is ahead of me. Its been a journey for sure, and its not stopping now.
See you soon,
S
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